ALL THE BEST JOKES YOU SEND TO US

 Did you know....

the word "gullible" isn't in the dictionary? Go and check it if you don't believe me.

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 European Call Centre

How To Handle Enquiries..........

British Rail...

Customer: "How much does it cost to Bath on the train?"

Operator: "If you can get your feet in the sink, then it's free".

Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?"

Operator: "Where did you get that number from, sir?"

Customer: "It was on the door to the Travel Centre".

Operator: "Sir, they are our opening hours".

Samsung Electronics...

Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"

Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking

about".

Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"

A Knitwear Company in Woven...

Operator: "Woven?  Are you sure?"

Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label - Woven in Scotland".

A man - making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box - told a worried operator: "I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on".

Caller: "I'd like the RSPCA please".

Operator: "Where are you calling from?"

Caller: "The living room".

RAC (Royal Automobile Club) Motoring Services...

Caller: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am traveling in Australia?"

Operator: "Doesn't the product give you a clue?"

Computer Capers...

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".

Customer: "OK".

Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"

Customer: "No".

Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"

Customer: "No".

Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"

Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click' on my notepad"!

Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just

realized

that

I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks, will I have my

file

back again?"

Welsh Directory Enquiries...

Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff,

please".

Operator: "I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?"

Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off".

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 If everything is coming your way....

you're in the wrong lane!

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 What do David Beckham and a Cartier watch have in common?

They both come in a Posh Box.

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