RANTS - ESTATE AGENTS AND MAGIC CAMERAS

Ok, credit where it's due, if you want to make pile of sh#te look like a luxury des-res then the estate agent guys have the skill. Of course it's made easier for them as they can buy those "trade only" magic cameras. You know the ones, they take a picture of a 2 foot square bathroom, described as "family size", and when it gets printed on the brochure the bath looks like an Olympic size swimming pool.

(Off topic a bit but why DO estate agents describe them as "family size" bathrooms? I mean do some families all go in and do a sh#t together?!)

"FAMILY SIZE LUXURY BATHROOM"

Normal camera	Magic camera

It begs the question, why don't Sony, or whoever makes them, sell them to the public? Even the MOD would pay over the odds for one of these. Take a photo of one of our depleted regiments and print it out and hey presto! An army, the size of which would even put the skitters into the massive Chinese forces!! The Scottish Tourist Association would love one of these cameras, a picture of Ben Nevis would make climbers the world over rush to the massive "new Everest" wondering why they had never noticed it before amongst the pictures of Tartan Dolls and tins of Shortbread usually adorning Scotland's brochures.

"LARGE LANDSCAPED GARDENS"

Normal camera	Magic camera

As for those people who try to sell us extensions to different parts of our bodies - well, the mind boggles at the marketing benefits to them!!

But no, at the moment it seems estate agents are the sole members to this exclusive club allowed access to purchase magic cameras. Of course they WERE invented for them to begin with, due to the problems they had with their language. How can you describe something that "demands to be viewed" without a suitable illustration? Something that will "satisfy the most discerning viewer" without a photo of a house to die for?

"REQUIRES SLIGHT UPGRADING"

Normal camera	Magic camera

As technology improves the magic cameras may become available to members of the general public but until then we will just have to believe what estate agents tell us, lets face it, at least we know the camera can never lie, or can it?!!

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